Sleeplessness and Salvation

Have you ever woken up feeling the weightiness of worry on your chest?  Perhaps your mind is so full of madness that you could not fall asleep?  Or maybe it’s a big decision or unconfessed sin looming in your life?  I have dealt with all of these.  Sometimes I still do.  I ask myself, what in the world am I doing this or that for?  When I search my heart, mind and spirit I find no answers.  I need to take my worry, madness, big decision and unconfessed sins to the Lord.  It is there, with Him, that I will find peace.  “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”  (Matthew 11:28)

These times of worry are often life issues that I hold onto so tightly I truly cannot breath. It is so easy for me, too easy, to get caught up in the circumstance, focus on it rather than on my Help.  God doesn’t want me to be weighed down or to worry, He wants me to be free.  I am reminded through scripture that even though I am burdened, “You, Lord, preserve my life; you stretch out your hand against the wrath of my enemies, and your right hand delivers me.” (Psalm 138:7)  God cares so much for me and you that he saves us from our enemies.  In some cases the enemy is that craziness in our wee minds.  You know hat self-talk or monkey chatter nonsense that rumbles through our brains.  I am so grateful for His mighty hand rescuing me.

rain on skylight
The dark sky looms, impatiently.
It overtakes my soul.
I cannot see clearly,
only raindrops dark as coal.

A tree of Hope is visible,
my eyes begin to see,
Lord Jesus takes the darkness,
My heart and soul are free.

Restless and sleepless nights have been no stranger in my life.  Sometimes its from something I said to one of my daughters that has left me feeling awful.  It has also been times when my beloved and I are in conflict with one another over some life issues.  Bottom line has been sleepless nights.   I can feel like the Israelites in Psalm 107:4-5, “Some wandered in desert wastelands, finding no way to a city where they could settle.  They were hungry and thirsty; their lives ebbed away.”  In these times I feel as though I’m in a desert, alone, thirsty and so very weary.   But, then I read on to verse 6 of Psalm 107, “Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress.”    I just need to read further, to look past my circumstance of desert wastelands and see God’s hand ready to delivery me from my distress.  He’s always ready to help, all I need to do is seek Him out.  I am so grateful that I serve such a loving and available God.

Decisions, decisions, decisions.  Life is full of decisions.  From what we are going to wear, to what we will serve for dinner, to decisions about employment, housing, bills.  The list goes on and on.  There are days we can feel like we’re drowning in the decisions to be made.  It makes me think of a small puddle where drops of water continually fall, eventually creating a pond.  Where did it all that water come from?

rain drop
It takes just one drop at a time to eventually create a pond or lake.   It’s times like this when I need to just stop. When I feel overcome by the weight of life’s decisions.  When I lack the strength or wisdom to make any decision.  Jeremiah 33:33 says, “Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.”   Call on the Lord and
He will.
He will answer.
He will answer you.

What a beautiful verse and reminder of how much God loves and cares for us.

Bottom line is all my sleeplessness, worry and difficulty in decision making have already be resolved by the One who so intricately and beautifully made me.  In my women’s Bible study we are studying Psalm 139.  It is a short Psalm, only 24 verses.  But so powerful, and reminds me,  through King David’s understanding of God’s heart, of how well God knows and cares for me.  He knows each one of us so very well.  I encourage you to read Psalm 139. You’ll see how wonderful the Lord is, how much He really knows and loves you, too.  Then you will want to hand over your worries and your warts to Him, and live out your life knowing God has your back.

two drops

Your life counts more than you know,
each part of you is just you.
God knit you together so carefully,
Your future He always knew.

Each hair upon your head He planned,
No detail left undone.
He knew the color of your eyes,
Before the earth had ever begun.

Like drops of water from a branch,
We don’t know where we’ll land.
But God who made the universe,
will always hold your hand.

So stand in confidence my friend,
And call on His name when you pray.
And He will surely slay your demons,
Each and every day.

PRAYER:  Dear Heavenly Father, I pray that whenever I am worrying, facing a decision or needing to confess my sins, I would run to You and place it all at Your feet.  I pray for each person that reads this that they would make You their Lord and Savior.  Thank You for loving me just as I am, just as You made me.  In Jesus’ name, Amen.

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Author: debrascowden

I love the Lord with all my heart, soul, body and mind and delight in sharing Jesus with others through my poetry and photography.

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