DELIGHT AND PAIN
By Debra Scowden, 2017
Blessed is the one who walks in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the way of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. Psalm 1:1-2
“No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful.. Later on, however it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.” Hebrews 12:11
This journey called life can somedays be delightful, and other days be brutally painful. Days when we are mostly carefree. To days when it seems the weight of the entire world rests upon our shoulders. Broken, beaten-down, lost and feeling very alone. A family of four, yet so many days I feel alone. O people; pour out your heart before him.
This is one of those times. Feeling very alone. I struggle with self-doubt, poor self-esteem, low self-worth. It feels as though the people who know my situation most, avoid me. I feel like a leper. I started the other evening feeling blessed, strong in the Lord. Then I felt like I was being looked at with pity. “Oh, poor Debra, she has such a hard life.” Feeling like a leach to those in my life. Sucking life out of them, so much so that they don’t want to be around me. Feeling, feels, felt…the Bible says,
“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?” Jeremiah 17:9
It also says,
“Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered.” Proverbs 28:26
Those feelings are, of course, lies. The enemy seeks out our weaknesses and takes hold of them doing his very best to squeeze the Lord completely out of our lives. But, God Almighty, El-Roi…The God who sees me and you, the One we are held by, is here to remind us of what He’s freely given. Forgiveness. Life eternal. Blessed. Love.
“For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.” 2 Timothy 2:3
So how do we combat the lies, self-doubt, poor self-esteem and low self-worth? The way may not be easy. I know for a fact it’s not. I do know, however, that when we put our trust in Jesus, He will make the way easier.
“You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.” (1 John 4:4).
The one who is in the world, Satan, is the prince of this world. He’s cunning, sneaky, and works very hard to feed our self-doubt, poor self-esteem and low self-worth. Clever one. Yet, he is NO match for my Savior, Jesus Christ.
“We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. So death is at work in us, but life in you.” 2 Corinthians 4:8-12 ESV.
These verses are exactly what my weary, broken, beaten-down, lost and lonely soul needs to hear, be reminded of, read and re-read. Proverbs 7:1-3 also reminds me…
”My son keep my words and treasure up my commands within you. Keep my commands and you will live; keep my teachings as the apple of your eye; bind them on your fingers; write them on the tablet of your heart.”
Another great reminder…
“Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.” 1 Peter 4:12-13 ESV
Whatever your fiery trials may be, remember to call upon Jesus, and you will, in the midst of the fire, know a peace that passes human understanding. You may still be surrounded by the flames, the temptation to give in the enemy. But, my friends, don’t. Instead,
“Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” James 4:7 ESV
“For God alone my soul waits in silence; from him comes my salvation. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be greatly shaken.
On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us. Selah”. Psalms 62:1-2, 7-8 ESV
Wait quietly before God,
Your victory will come.
His promises are timeless and true.
Freedom assured from Satan’s thumb.
All your days the Lord Jesus foreknew.
Peace beyond our worldly comprehension,
A safe place to run, a fortress, our refuge.
Let your heart and your mind trust, rest,
As God’s living water o’er you deluge.
With Him you’ve conquered, no longer opprest.
All victory and honor come from God alone
His protection and strength none can fathom.
Wait quietly before God, he’ll light the way
His great power’ll save you from the chasm.
Far away from you, Satan will fearfully stay.
O dear God in Heaven, creator of all,
Let our hearts be forever grateful.
For no one or nothing from You can separate
When we trust upon You, and are ever praiseful.
And we quietly, faithfully, in victory, wait.
“He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside quiet waters.” Psalm 23:2 NIV
“I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I hope.” Psalm 130:5 ESV
As I was finishing the writing of this post this morning, this song came on. Trust. The exact thing I need to remember to do.
May God richly bless you, may you always call on the name of Jesus, and may you always hear his still small voice.
In Christ’s love,